Believing In?

An aspect of the way my addict confronts his sobriety is to believe as humans we are not the “end all” of life. He is certain there exists something greater than “us” that we can lean on in times of struggle. I’ve always felt the same way. Throughout my life I have studied many faiths. Never believing in any one in-particular but, knowing I am not the greatest “being” in existence. If I am, we are all caught in a big mess.

I was baptized Methodist, per Grandma’s insistence. Santa and Easter Bunny provided fond memories. Dad explained religion to me when I was very young. He taught me faith is highly personal and to respect the choice every person makes. He closed the lesson by letting me know he would support any choice I made. Thus began my research into religions of the world. So fascinating, I am still a student of the subject.

My husband was raised a little different. In his house the only option was Catholic. Until his sobriety he never thought twice about spirituality. As a couple we never discussed it. Then came the moment I realized his sobriety had allowed him to gain a better understanding of faith than I had. Annoyed by this, I dwelled on it for a while. I had so many questions. When did he become more knowledgable than me at one of “my things”? Out of the two of us I was the open minded one towards religion. Now he has a “greater power”? What if i don’t agree with his choice? Isn’t this something we should discuss and decide upon as a couple?

He explained to me his spirituality was personal and I was not involved in that relationship. For so long I prided myself on being open to every faith. Now, all of a sudden I’m watching my addict grow beyond me. I had spent so much time learning about all the world’s religions and never picked anything to believe in. His actions made me seriously think about my own. As I considered religion becoming a part of my life, my addict became a person I highly respect. Could I ask for anything more?

L.K. Brown

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About L.K. Brown

I like reading, sports & the outdoors. My hobbies are the theatre, DIY projects & writing. I've been with my husband for nine years supporting his recovery from drug addition through the good times & bad. It is still a daily process. Follow me on Pinterest L.K. Brown
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